Spread Some Joy Around

-by Kathleen Kovarik, Executive Director

“Be a cheerful giver”.  It is better to give than to receive”.  Perhaps you grew up, like I did, being taught with expressions like these.  Most likely you can access memories of giving from the heart that brought you great joy.  If so, you’ll find it interesting to know that science is finally confirming what you have known for years. 

In a recent Associated Press article, the headlines proclaimed, “Scientists:  It’s better to give than receive”.  The article highlights lead researcher Elizabeth W. Dunn, an assistant professor of psychology at the University of British Columbia, who conducted research along with researchers at Harvard University, to see whether or not the way that people spent their money positively impacted their overall happiness.  Previous studies had shown that having more money can increase happiness.  Dunn “wasn’t surprised that doing something for others made people happy.  But she was struck by how big the effect was and that how people spent money was more important than how much money they had”.  Remarking on the results of her research, Dunn concludes, “This work suggests that even making small alterations in how we spend money on a daily basis can make a difference in happiness.”

Financial management guru Suze Orman also lauds generosity.  In her book, “Women and Money” (2007), Orman says,

True generosity goes far beyond what you give to others.  In giving there is a power, an understanding that you are just the vessel that wealth or energy flows through.  You allow money to come in through your hands and out through your heart.  To be empowered to give, to be moved to give straight from the heart, is a feeling that all the money in the world could never buy (page 50). 

With the ideas of generosity and the happiness it generates in mind, I’d like to share with you a recent experience of mine, precipitated by a staff member’s generous heart. 

I was having a very long work-day with no end in sight, when I took my first “break” of the day at 4:00 p.m. to pick up the office mail and finally get some lunch at a popular fast food “emporium”.  As I sorted through the mail from our post office box, I was heartened by two donations that the Foundation received—one for $500 and one for $5—both very much appreciated. Reflecting on the beautiful, giving nature of our benefactors, another example of generosity shared by my co-worker, Cheryl Bettmeng, came to mind.   

Cheryl’s technique for spontaneous giving is simple, but incredibly effective!  When going through a drive-through restaurant, she will be inspired to pay for the car right behind her, anonymously.  When she spoke of how much fun she had with this, I knew I should try it myself.  And today seemed like the perfect time. 

At the drive-up window, I tried to explain to the teenage boy what I wanted to do.  This alone was challenging.  He had a hard time believing that I wanted to pay the bill for a total stranger.  Then, the next challenge that came along was to manage a quick get-away, as the idea is to keep your giving anonymous.  Looking in my rear-view mirror, as I was waiting for my “healthy” quarter pounder with cheese, I could see the teenager leaning out his window, talking to the woman in the car and pointing to my car ahead.  I grabbed my bag from the 2^nd window, and screeched off into the sunset.  What a blast!  I laughed and grinned all the way back to work, and was astounded at how joyful such a small act of kindness proved to be. 

Giving enlarges us.  Here in South Dakota and the Midwest people are known to be particularly generous, giving at a level far above other states with much higher per capita incomes.  Maybe it is because we are close to the earth, and, as farmers and gardeners, thus understand this quote attributed to Francis Bacon: “Money is like manure; of very little use except to be spread.”  So, however you decide to give, enjoy yourself as you spread a little joy around.